Drunkie Paulie and Raging Ringo!
by ilovemyboys
Summary: After an evening of partying the Beatles are all worn out. All except Paul and Ringo.
1. Where's the Lads?

**Drunkie Paulie And Raging Ringo!**

_By ilovemyboys_

Chapter 1: Where's the lads?

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><p><em>It was a regular Beatles evening. A party of dancing and drinking with the important, rich folks of society. The Fab Four had already danced the night away and had a few extra drinks at the party that night...<em>

Brian Epstein is a busy man with a busy schedule. To make his life more interesting, _and _at the same time more horrifying, is all the Beatle Mania surrounding him. And as such, all the Beatle madness. They had been at this party since 7 p.m. and it was now midnight, with an interview for the boys in the morning. With all their tours and performances, he made sure all their traveling was taken care of at all times, _at any time_. And that included tonight. The cab was to arrive in only 15 minutes.

_**BRIAN'S POV: **_

_Great! The cab'll be here in only 15 minutes and the boys are __**nowhere **__to be found! Knowing them they've probably each got a __**lady friend **__in one arm and a cold one in the other. Too bad everyone here fits that description…_

As I look around the room for the third time in a row I catch at least _one _of the boys.

Coming up from behind him, as he's talking away to some young ladies, I tap him on the shoulder rather sharply as he turns around to face me, grinning as his eyes meet mine.

"'Ello Brian. What's going on with you?"

"Cut the small talk John. The cab for you and the lads is coming in _fifteen _minutes, so I need you to get the boys and be ready. Got it?" I snap.

"Sure Brian…uh…are you sure you don't-"

Their manager had left.

"Well blimey."

**JOHN'S POV:** _Well, we got less than 10 minutes before that cab arrives. Better see what the other fellas are up to…._

As I walk around the room searching for the lads, I see Ringo by the bar, talking to some pretty bird and laughin'. In a short amount of time I see George too, drinking at a table with some older, business fellas. _He better not be making any deals in his state…_

_Now to Paulie. Oh where oh where could my Paulie be…_

I look at every bar and table for Paul, but can't find him anywhere.

_Where the bloody 'ell as he gone?_

Just as I was gonna make another 'round, I see him. Passed out and slouched on a couch with a bottle in his hand.

_Blimey- _I drag a hand over my face.

_Looks like good ol', wholesome Paulie's had a bit too much to drink eh?_

I grin.

_This could be interesting. _

I stride over and stop in front of him.

"Paul?" I jab his arm.

Nothing.

I crouch down and call loudly into his ear.

"PAUUUULLLIEEE?"

"Huh?" he says groggily, looking up at me with heavy eyelids.

"Hey John," he gives me a loopy smile. "What'sss _going on_?" He slurs.

"What's going is we're leaving soon so stay put. **Got it?**"

"Yeah, sure…"

I nod and stand up.

_Now to Rings. _

I come up behind Ringo, still talking to the lovely lass.

"Ahem." I say, smiling politely.

Ringo turns around with a frown on his face.

"_What you want_ _**Lennon?**_ Can't you _see_ I've got meself a pretty _**girl**_?" He slurs drunkenly.

"Yes I can see that." I give her a nod and a smile. She smiles flirtatiously back at me.

"Point is we're leavin' soon and we gotta be ready when the cab comes. So stay put? Got it?"

"Yeah, yeah…" he mumbles.

_Alright. I think she'll keep him there awhile. Now to George…_

I turn around-

_BUMP! _My chest hits-

"Paul?" I ask, surprised.

_How in the bloody 'ell he get here so fast? I could have sworn he was out for the count._

"Hi John." He smiles.

"Hello…" I say wearily.

"John, I _gotta tellyou something…" _

"In a second Paul."

"Bu-uh…okaaay….."

As I make my way over to George I can see Paul following me from behind. Rolling my eyes I come up to Georgie's table.

"Hello fellas." I smile down at the gentlemen.

"Hello Mr. Lennon," they say.

"He hasn't made any foul business plans has he?" I joke, although in reality I am _indeed _asking.

They laugh as I look down at a weary George.

"George, we gotta go soon. Get ready."

He looks up at me, exhausted.

"Yeah, guess it is, isn't it? Probably shouldn't have any more anyway…"

"Yeah I would agree with ya on that one lad," I say, eyeing his four empty drinks.

Slowly he gets up and gives the gentlemen a small wave of his hand as he mutters quietly, "Nice talkin' to you gentlemen…"

"Thank you Mr. Harrison," they say their thanks as Georgie stands up in front of me. Paul then appears out of nowhere next to George, who glances over at him briefly.

"Alright, let's go get Ringo." I say.

They follow me to where Ringo's sitting when I notice Paul getting a little too close to George's comfort zone, as George gives him a frown, trying to inch away.

"Hey George.,." he smiles, inches away from George's face.

George looks at him questioningly, then grins.

"Hello Paul. What did _you _drink tonight?"

"Oh…a bit of this…a bit of that…."

George gives me a look.

"I didn't do it." I defend.

As we gradually make it over to Rings, I come up behind him.

"Alright Ringo, we're going. Say good-bye to the nice lady."

**"Whaaaaa?"** he asks, clearly still out of it.

"We-are going-**now**." I annunciate each word slowly.

"No...**_you_** can go. **I'm** _shh_taying." He mumbles, turning back toward the bar.

The woman leans in next to Ringo, as she speaks softly into his ear, "I have to go anyway sweetie. Talk to you another time, okay?"

"Alright…" Ringo mumbles, as she gets up to leave. "**GOODBYE MY ANGEL**…**sleep well!**…." He declares loudly.

She winks back at him as she walks away.

"Alright Rings, can you get up on your own?" I ask.

"Of course I can!" he sputters, annoyed. Slowly getting off the stool he tries to stand but sways a bit as me and George catch him in time.

"Great. Just great Ringo." I grumble.

_Blimey! Why do __**I **__got to be the only bloody one in charge 'ere?_

"Johnnnn…" Paul whines, _right behind my ear, _I might add.

"What?" I snap.

_"You're my best friend…"_

George is looking over at us, then gives me a teasing smile.

"You're a lucky man Mr. Lennon."

"Shut up," I remark.

"_Joooohnnn."_

"Yeah I heard ya Paul…"

"No I _mean it_, you _are_…"

"We betta get 'em both back soon before they fall down in front of us and we have to carry them to their hotel rooms." George says.

"At this rate we'll have to carry them to the _cab_ first," I say grudgingly.

_We really need to get going. _

By the time we reach the entrance, what with Paul commenting on every blimey light he sees and Ringo commenting on every pretty lass _he_ sees, meanwhile trying to get away from the grasp me and George have on him, we finally make it toward the place's exit.

"Bout time." I say. "Now to wait for that cab driver. He better not be late."

In a few moments time a cab pulls up, and sure enough it's one of our cab drivers from earlier this week. Hired just for us.

A burly, balding, bearded man in a dark blue chauffeur uniform comes out from the driver's seat and opens our doors, greeting us with a cheery, "Good evening lads!" Me and George nod in greeting as he helps us get Paul and Ringo in the middle back seats. In a few minutes we're on the road.

_**IN CAR:** _

"So you lads had a good party?" He asks from the front.

_How in the bloody 'ell can be so filled with energy at this hour?_

"Yeah…" George mumbles a response, slowly drifting off to sleep.

"A bit of fun eh?" He chuckles. "Ahhh, I remember those days… "

_Great. Another geezer talkin' 'bout his days growin' up…_

He begins a long rant on something-or-other as I lay my head against the seat. George is passed out, like Ringo and Paul.

_There ain't no way I'm bringin' 'em all up._

"And then _that's_ when I told her, you see, that's when I said it's the-oh!" He stops, noticing them asleep.

"Best not wake them up eh?" He winks at me.

I don't say anything, cuz frankly there's nothing to say.

As we arrive at the hotel, he gets out once again and opens our door. It's starting to drizzle. George's eyes slowly open as he looks up at the man, confused.

"Haha. Don't worry lad, just your chauffeur here, _at your service._" He removes his hat, giving us a slight bow.

"Right…" George says, getting up."How you wanna do this?" He asks me with half open eyes.

I glance over at the chauffeur.

"Would you help us get them inside?" I ask.

"Why of _course_ lads! No trouble at all!" He exclaims, placing his hat back on.

"How you chaps think we should do it?" I ask, glancing at each of them.

"Well…" the chauffeur thinks, placing a hand on his beard, as he curls it. "I'm sure they could walk to an extent if we were to wake them."

"Worth a try." George says quietly.

"Alright." I say, looking down at a sleeping Paul resting on my shoulder.

"Paul." I nudge him with my shoulder.

**"Paul."** I say again. Rolling my eyes in irritation, I position myself so I can reach him better.

"**Paul!"** I say louder, this time shaking both his shoulders.

He still doesn't budge.

"Well this chap's lost…" I grumble. Looking over I see that George and the chauffeur have at least gotten Ringo somewhat awake.

"I say we take Ringo up first, then come back for Paul." The chauffeur says.

"If you say so," I reply.

I suppose that works, and seeing I really don't have any energy to think of anything else I nod in agreement.

As he and George and a semi-conscious Ringo get out of the car, I shut the door behind them as I wait in my seat. Paul still slumped against me.


	2. John's Hidden Side

**Drunkie Paulie And Raging Ringo!**

_By ilovemyboys_

Chapter 2: John's Hidden Side

**Authors Note:** Oh my gosh this turned so heartfelt! Italics indicate thoughts as well as Paul's groggy state.

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><p><em>The rain…the rain just <strong>has<strong> to make my life more difficult. _

I sigh as I look out the bleary car window into the night.

_I'm startin' to get tired…*yawwwwn*_

I feel movement next to me and look down at Paulie slumped against my shoulder as he moves slightly to a more comfortable position with a sighed "ahhh…"

_Huh! He seems a whole lot more comfortable than me. But not for long. I'm sure as 'ell not gonna carry him up to our room. Even with the others help. If Ringo could get out on his own, so can Paul. Mine as well try to wake him up...the fellas'll be back soon…_

I look down at Paul once more as he sleeps contently.

"Paul." I move my shoulder away from him as he slides down onto the car seat and continues sleepin.'

I rub a hand across my face in irritation, then prop him up against the back seat and call his name: "Paul! **Paul! Wake up!"**

I shake him roughly a few times and give him a slap on the cheek, but it's no use.

I exhale irritably as he rests across the back seat. _This will take awhile. He's out cold. _

I look down at his _still _sleeping form.

_What in the 'ell did you drink Paul?_

…...

After about 5 minutes and still no sign of the others I wonder how long it took a semi-conscious Ringo up the stairs compared to Paul.

Just then I see Paul's head move slightly to the side as he sighs out.

Straightening up quickly I grab hold of his shoulders and shake him again, calling his name.

In just a few seconds his eyes actually start to flutter open and meet mine.

"_John?" _He asks confused.

"In the flesh," I give him my famous grin.

"_What's going on?"_

_He's so bloody confused and child-like. Oh this'll be fun…_I roll my eyes.

"You're in our bloody cab by the hotel we're stayin' at. _And_ got yourself drunk!"

"_I did?" _He furrows a brow.

"Yeah. Ya did. And don't play all modest and wholesome here Paul. That charade won't work with me."

He gave me a delayed smile at that with a light chuckle. _"Nothing escapes you ey John?"_

"You bet nothing does."

"_But you **are** wrong you know…"_

"On _what _may I ask?"

"_On me putting on a charade. I __**am**__ wholesome and modest…most of the time…"_ he smirks.

"Yeah, yeah…_meanwhile_ I'm the sarcastic, crude one."

"_Only cuz you __**act**__ that way Johnny,"_ Paul counters with a teasing smile.

"Can't help it. Like you said, it's part of who I am."

"_You just don't show your other side…" _

"'S'cuse me?"

"_Well…everyone's got sides of themselves they show others and don't show others…_ he mumbles.

"So what side don't I show?"

_I knew what he would say but I wanted to hear it anyway. _

"_The thoughtful, caring John, who cares enough about his friends that he waits in a cab out in the pouring rain and let's his best, drunk friend sleep against his shoulder…"_

"Hey! I thought you were asleep!"

"_I was drifting in and out…I could hear ya calling my name I think, but went back to sleep instead."_

"Yeah. Figures…" I grumble.

"_But it's all fine now…"_

"Oh yeah? What makes ya say that**?" **I ask bluntly.

"_Well…we're gonna go inside the hotel right?"_

"Eventually…"

"_Well, by that time…we'll all be in warm beds and go to sleep. Not wanting to wake up to bloody hangovers."_

I laugh at that. Good ol' Paul talking about hangovers isn't a very often occurrence.

He breathed out a sigh. Then looked back at me. _"So John..." _he lagged on.

I wait for him to continue his sentence and was about to remark on his lateness with a snide remark when he added, _"How come you don't show that side?"_

"S'cuse me?"

"_How come you don't show that side very often?"_

Paul was definitely lucky he was in this state or I'd give him my mind. He knows never to ask me personal, uncomfortable stuff like that! Too bad for him I'm not nice.

"_John?"_

"**I ain't answerin' Paul,"** I reply roughly.

"_But John-"_

"No buts! I don't feel like talkin' 'bout me feelings and shit."

"_I didn't say you have to. Just wondering why you don't, that's all….It's nice," _he adds.

_What was that?_

"_**What in the bloody 'ell you mean by that?"**_ I snap.

"_I get that your __**wittiness**__ is a trait you have, but your compassion is just as good. In fact…it'sss beetter," _he slurred slightly.

_Well I least I know this ain't some prank he's trying to pull. Couldn't even **try **in his state…_

"_Well John?"_

"Well what! I don't gotta answer nothing from you, got it?"

"_Ooookaaaaay…" _He begins to drift off, sinking his head into the seat.

"Hey! Now don't go back to sleep again! You know how hard it was for me to wake ya up in the first place?"

"_Oh…sorry. Okay I'll stay up…" _He lets out a big yawn as he positions himself in an upright position.

"_But you gotta talk to keep me awake John."_

"Oh blimey…" I grumble. "**Fine…**"

…...

We talked about some upcoming performances we had this week and what we thought of the fans and "professionals" in charge of the past events we had.

"They can never bloody get over our hair. Just deal with it!" I grumble again.

"_I know…it's ridic-u-lous…...__They act like they've neeever seen it before…"_ Paul spoke slowly.

"How about the welcome?"

"_Oh, it was fantastic!"_

"Paul. This ain't an interview. You can be honest."

"_Hey! I am. I thought it was **cool **how they did that uh…welcome thing for us."_

I roll my eyes, shaking my head at the sheer lunacy of some of the fans.

"_So Johnny?"_

"Yeah?" I answer, tiredly.

"_How come you never-"_

"**Ah ,ah, ah! I told you Paul…"** I warn.

"_Ohhh…" _he sighs disappointedly.

I sigh out heavily. _Can't he get it into his head I don't like talking about myself!_

"_So John? How many d-drinks did you have tonight?" _He gives me a small grin.

"Two."

His mouth gapes open at me.

"Yeah, yeah…**don't** say a word…I just didn't feel like it tonight, that's all…"

"_Something bothering you?"_

"What? No. I just didn't feel like it," I snap.

"_Oh…I see…" _He yawns.

It's silent for about 10 seconds and I begin thinking about what Paul asked.

_It's really not a big deal. I don't show certain sides for a reason. The public sees me one way and that way is fine with me. What do I care? I can show some compassion sometimes if I want. As long as it ain't too sappy. Paul's the one that writes those songs…_

I hear the rain begin to come down harder. Paul notices too as he looks out the window.

"_Pretty bad out there isn't it? _

"Yeah," I agree. "When in the bloody 'ell are they coming back? Wouldn't be surprised if they forgot all about us."

"_Why do we have to wait? We could just…go up, right?"_

"Paul," I look at him seriously. "You can barely stay awake, you're drunk, and look like you'd fall over the minute your foot touches the ground, and on _top _of that I ain't gonna carry you for _any _of the way, got it?"

"_Okay, okay, I was just saying…"_

I breathe out another sigh. _This is really getting on my nerves…I don't even know why. Maybe it was Paul bringing up my feelings. Why's he gotta care so much? It ain't his business. _

"_Hey John?" _he calls me again.

_If he asks me that **one more time-**_

"_I'm getting really sleepy again…"_

"No! Don't you dare Paul!"

"_But Johhhhhnnn…" _he wines loudly.

_My gosh, that sounds horrible. _

"No buts Paul! Now be quiet! I'm thinkin'."

"_Bout what?"_

"None of your business."

"_Johhnnn…that's not very nice…"_

"Like I care…"

"_But caring is good John…"_

_**Oh-my-bloody-**_

"_John?"_

"Will you shut up McCartney! Geez! You're freakin' driving me crazy! Who knew you'd be a talkative drunk! Actually I take that back. _Of course _you'd be!"

"_Yeah…" _he agrees, his voice fading.

I place a hand on my forehead. _You can get through this. Just find a way to get him to be quiet…Tell him your feelings or something. That seems to be what he wants. _

"Alright Paul. I'm gonna tell ya how I feel, alroi?"

Her perks up at that, as he looks at me straight in the eye.

"I'm **feeling** really **annoyed** right now by your constant **questions**," I say slowly. "So if you want to make me feel **better **stop **talking," **I force a smile through clenched teeth.

He actually _does _stop talking for about 3 whole minutes! Then starts humming_ Love Me Do _that quickly gets stuck in my head.

_Bloody 'ell! Like I don't already get **all** our songs stuck in my head!_

"Paul, would you** stop** humming!"

"_But John…I can't talk to you…you don't seem very happy…"_

"You're right about that. I'm not," I say flatly.

"_So **I **gotta sing…"_

"And why is that?"

"_Because it'ssss woooonderful…" _he smiles dreamily.

_Great. _

"Alright Paul. Fine! Go ahead!" I say, putting my hands up in the air in defeat.

A few more minutes go by as he hums other songs of ours.

….._(hum, hum)_

…. _(hum, hum)_

….._(hum, hum)_

_I can't take this any longer!_

"_Hey John?"_

"**What!"** I snap.

"_What's your favorite song of ours?"_

"I don't know."

He looks down, shaking his head in understanding.

"_I don't know mine either…"_

"Fine," I say, not interested in the least about this conversation.

It's silent for about 10 more seconds until I finally hear the fellas coming back.

_About time!_

I turn to face Paul. "Alright, we're going out."

He nods his head tiredly in response as we turn our gazes out the window.


	3. Silly Face!

Drunkie Paulie and Raging Ringo

By ilovemyboys

Chapter 3: Silly Face!

**Authors Note: **Oh my gosh it's been forever! But I always did want to finish this, so here goes! _Italics _show when Paul's talking just shows his out-of-it drunk nature.

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><p><em><strong>PAUL'S POV:<strong> _

_Mmmm…_ I smiled as sleep called to me.

"Paul. We gotta go," I heard John say.

"_Go away John…" _ I mumbled.

"**No.** We're goin' inside."

I heard a car door open. _On my left, or right, or-whatever. Haha. _

"Alrighty Paulie, come on," I heard Georgie's voice.

"_But whyyyy…." _ I complained.

"Because we gotta get you upstairs and to bed. Wouldn't you rather sleep up there than in here?"

"_No."_

_Frankly, I wanted to stay here. _

"Too bad," George said flatly. "John?"

I suddenly felt myself pulled up from behind as John's hands lifted me under me armpits.

"_What the 'ell John?" _I tried to come off angrily, but I don't think it worked, since I not only didn't get a response from him, but found myself sitting upright.

Groaning, I opened my eyes to see George next to me with the car door open and horribly cold air coming through.

"_Shut the door! It's bloody cold!" _

"I will once you get out and we head inside," George replied smugly.

I grumbled to myself, then flung a foot out the door as I tried to stand up in the cold. Swaying, I felt George's hand on my back, stopping my fall backwards.

"Come on Paul," he smiled as he put my arm around his shoulder, and we made our way towards the hotel.

"_It's-blood cold-and-I hate it-I-bloody-hate it-"_

"Yes Paul we know…" John sighed from behind as we walked. I could tell he was rolling his eyes.

"_I KNOW you're rrrrollling your e-eyes J-John…." _ I attempted to give him a glare.

"Oh dear. What am I going to do about that?" He raised his hands up in the air, sarcastically.

"_Sh-sh-shut up John."_

He actually laughed at that. _Probably making f-f-fun of me…_

"Ya might want to be careful Paul. Who knows what John will use against you tomorrow, on what you say tonight," George grinned.

"_I'm just…c-c-c cold, that's a-a-all…." _I retorted.

"_Suuure_ you are mate," John grinned.

_"I am!"_

As we made our way into the hotel I instantly felt relief. Then we went on the elevator up to our floor. I was in between John and George cuz I almost fell earlier and they for some reason thought I couldn't support myself. Huh!

"So how's Ringo?" John asked.

"Went out like a light," George smiled.

"I bet. Of course if he's anything like Paulie here, he'll just pretend the whole thing never happened."

"_No I don't!"_

"Yeah. Ya will Paul. Cuz your "good, clean image" is so important to you," John teased.

"_Shut up. I can have fun too, ya know."_

"I never said you couldn't."

The elevator door opened and I felt each of them grab one of my arms as we got out.

"_I can walk on my __**own **__ya know."_

"I doubt that chap," John said.

"_But I caaaaaan."_

"Paul, quit whining. I'm tired and I wanna go to bed," George sighed.

"_I'm not whining-"_

"Be quiet Paul. Yes you are," John cut in.

I grumbled to myself as I was led to the double rooms Brian booked for us. George took out the key from my pocket, since I guess it was closest, he said, after I asked why he took it, and we walked in. I heard John lock the door behind us and then I was led to my bed and sat down.

I looked around and noticed someone was missing.

**"_Where's Ringo?"_**

"Shhh! Paul! Not so loud! He's sleeping, remember?" George said.

"_Oh yeah…"_

"What happened to that Chauffeur?" John asked.

"He had to leave," George replied.

"Makes sense," John nodded. "Alright Paul. Let's get you to bed." And with that he began to take my shoes off.

"_Hey! What are you-" _George put a hand over my mouth.

"Ringo's sleeping Paul, remember?"

"_Yeah but…why are you taking off my shoes?"_

"You wanna sleep with them on?" John asked.

"_What? No. But why are YOU doing it for me?"_

"Cuz I'm nice," John showed me a big, toothy smile.

"_No, I doubt that…You're never nice…"_

"Awww. Paul! I'm hurt!" John put a hand over his heart.

"This will take forever if you do it on your own Paul," George added.

"_Why?"_

George looked like he gave John a grouchy look as John smiled.

"It happens when you drink too much Paul. Your coordination is all off," John replied.

"_But I'm fine."_

"Fine. You wanna prove it?" George almost snapped as he stood up.

"_George…you seem angry…maybe you need to go to sleep too…"_

"Damn right I do!"

John snickered.

"Shut up John!" George hissed.

Meanwhile I was trying to take off my socks and found what he said was true. I tried three times to take them both off and didn't succeed. Finally John pulled off my socks in seconds.

"There. Now go to bed. I'm not undressing you too."

I nodded and laid down.

_Ahhhh….sleep….._

I rested peacefully and slowly drifted off….

_**JOHN'S POV:** _

_In seconds Paul was out like a light. _

I grinned. Oh Paul…

"I'm going to bed. Night," George said tiredly as he went to our room.

"Night," I said.

I was pretty tired meself but I had to do one-last-thing. Quietly making my way toward the bathroom, I snuck in, grabbed the supplies I needed, came out, and went to work with a smile every mad scientist would be proud of.

All I can say, is good thing those bathrooms come with some basic make-up. Or this would be a lot harder to pull off.

Standing up, I looked down and admired my work.

"Not too bad. If I do say so meself."

On the bed, lay Paul. His face covered in cosmetics.

And that was just what I woke up to the next morning, as a very girly looking, hung-over Paul threw my door open.

**"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO JOHN!"**

I smirked.

"Me? Nothing. You must have had quiet the party last night, ey Paul?"

**THE END!**


End file.
